Finding Out

Well, I wasn't kidding when I said that if you aren't facing hardships now, you will be soon. Although I was facing some hardships, I didn't see what was coming next. I recently found out that I'm pregnant. Now, I'm not saying that children aren't a blessing. In fact, I know very well that they are; I've been close to a few couples who have found it difficult to conceive. I know what joy a little baby can bring. But, I also know what commitment and responsibility little-ones also require, and this is what scares me.


My husband and I are both unemployed (or will be soon). We don't own or even rent our own place, and we've never actually lived together. My husband is in the military, and I have been going to school. So now my life has completely changed. This is exciting and (when looked at with the right attitude) really fun. I'm moving across the country where I will be with my husband but not my family, and I am looking for some type of employment to pay of debt before the baby comes, which is difficult because I haven't moved yet.

I'm in a state of utter inactivity: in between plan and chaos. But I've been diligent in my discipline and positive attitude. I'm going to do well with all of this some how or another.

If God only gives us what we can handle, then he must have a lot of faith in me and what I can handle. I thank God everyday for allowing me to believe in him, while he believes in me. I will learn from this experience, and some day, I know I will look back on this scary new and uncertain time, and I will miss it terribly because it's the scary and unknown that helps us define who we are and why.

Bored but busy

Have you ever had one of those days in which you have so much to do but nothing to do?

There are things I could do to help out my parents, and I will.
There are things I could do for myself, but they can wait until tomorrow; I'm not really in any hurry. So now, here I am with a to-do list but no desire to get off my but and do anything. Today, I've gone for a walk with my dog, talked to my husband, and cleaned the kitchen... I've taken a shower and made my mother some lunch. I don't think I could ever be a stay-at-home wife. I would go crazy. I think I'm going nuts from not having a full-time job... I know I'll miss these days when I'm back at school and work but as for now. I'm bored.

My dad used to always say only boring people are bored. And honestly I'm not BORED so much as I feel guilty for not working.

"Faith that isn't tested is worthless"

I went to church today at Citipoint in Mount Vernon, and I really love being there. I always learn a lot about myself and my personal obstacles when I'm there. Here are some things that really hit home for me:


I've always gone with the flow, but when I decided to do the right thing and follow my heart and God, I pivoted to go against the flow. In doing so, I've faced staggaring obsticals, and I am consistantly tempted by what tempts me. For example, I'm not tempted by stealing or killing, but I have my vices that work to get me to do and say things I shouldn't. What has worked to convince me to do the wrong thing in the past, will be able to convinve me again if I am not strong enough to avoid it. Good choices are never easy, but fighting to make the right choice and do the right thing is what makes me a good person and a Christian.


In his sermon, Pastor Ken shared that he found in his research that 398/413 of the most successful people in the world overcame major hardship to achieve their goal. He used the story of David and Goliath to explain that we all have hardships and opposition to doing the right thing everyday, and these things are keeping us from our potential. But real contenders, real fighters, become strong by doing the little things; it's practice and technique that prepares a great fighter for battle, and it's fighting for the good everyday that helps to prepare me for the real battles in life. If I can stay faithful everday in the small things, then my strength will build to aid me in the fight. It will be there when I need it most through the most difficult times in my life as long as I don't abandon it now when things are relatively easy.

Now, to be honest, things are not easy in my life. Being married to a member of the United States Military is emotionally draining, and fighting financial battles everyday because I love my job, but it doesn't love me back ($), is exhausting. But all of this is a cakewalk to what life could be, and when it gets worse (and it will get worse), I know that I can lean on the faith that I have to pull me through. The faith that carries me through the little things everyday will also help me out when things get really hard, as long as I've practiced.


And now, here, on my new blog, I'm learning to share my walk with God and what I have learned with others in the hopes that it will help me become a better Christian, and I can help others think about their lives and what they really want and deserve. If any of this has made you think, and you want to share your experiences comment back. Or, if you saw the sermon and have different ideas about it, let me know.

Amanda's First Real Blog

I've blogged on Myspace and Facebook, but I've never free-styled before. I'm a free-style blogger now! I came home from church today and spent some time with my niece and my mom. We introduced my niece to my dog Chunk; it was pretty amazing. Raichel is the cutest little one-year-old in the world!